One of the biggest lessons I have been learning through mediumship is that sometimes the most important thing I can do is simply get out of the way😂.
There are many different approaches to mediumship. Some mediums intentionally attune to a specific person in spirit, perhaps because the sitter has come hoping to hear from a particular loved one. Others prefer to begin without knowing who the sitter wants to connect with and allow whichever communicator comes forward to lead the reading. Neither approach is inherently better. I have experimented with both, and I have found that I can often attune to a particular spirit when I intentionally reach for that connection. Still, I am realizing that this is not how I prefer to work.
For me, mediumship feels most natural when it is spirit-led.
An Experience That Changed My Approach
I had already been leaning toward working exclusively with spirit-led mediumship. It was the approach I was first introduced to through Suzanne Giesemann’s beginner course and later encountered again in my studies at Arthur Findlay College. Then, one particular reading helped solidify that choice for me.
One morning, well before that days session began, I had been strongly sensing the presence of a male spirit. The impression stayed with me throughout the morning, and looking back, I should have trusted what was already presenting itself. When the reading began, however, the sitter was very focused on wanting to hear from her sister. Rather than following the male presence I had already been sensing, I attempted to shift my attention and intentionally attune to her sister.
I could not establish that connection.
Eventually, I began receiving impressions from a female spirit, but what I was receiving did not seem to correspond with the sitter’s sister. Because the sitter was so focused on hearing from her sister, we never really determined whether the woman I was sensing might have been another person connected to her (she wouldn’t say anything other than “that’s not my sister”). The experience felt like I was reaching rather than receiving.
It stayed with me because I realized that someone seemed to have already been stepping forward before the reading even began. Instead of trusting that connection, I moved away from it because I thought I needed to deliver the person the sitter hoped to hear from. That experience reinforced something I had already been feeling: I need to trust the connection that presents itself.
Letting Spirit Choose the Conversation
Spirit-led mediumship, for me, means entering a reading without deciding who should communicate or what the reading should be about. I become receptive and allow the communicator to establish themselves through whatever comes first. That might be personality, appearance, memories, relationships, physical sensations, emotions, or something seemingly insignificant that only makes sense to the sitter.
My job is to follow spirits lead.
This does not mean I never ask internally for clarification or explore something further. Mediumship is still an active process. The difference is that I am responding to what I receive rather than trying to determine ahead of time where the communication should go. There is a certain amount of surrender involved in that. I have to trust that perhaps the spirit who comes forward knows something I do not. Maybe there is a message, memory, acknowledgement, or connection that needs to happen at that particular moment.
Sometimes it may also simply come down to the connection itself. Just as we connect more naturally with certain people while we are living, I believe there may be energetic or vibrational factors that affect how easily I connect with particular communicators in spirit.
Releasing the Pressure to Bring Forward Someone Specific
There is another reason this approach feels so important to me. When someone desperately wants to hear from one particular person, it can create a great deal of pressure around the connection. Even with the best intentions, that expectation can sometimes interfere with the natural flow of the reading. The pressure to make a specific connection happen can make it easier to start reaching, overinterpreting, or trying too hard to force impressions. In some cases, I have found that the intensity of that expectation can make the connection feel even more difficult to establish.
Spirit-led mediumship helps remove some of that pressure. It allows me to stay open to whoever naturally steps forward rather than trying to make the reading fit a specific hope or expectation. It also asks for a certain amount of trust, because as living people, we do not always know what is best for us in a given moment. From my perspective, spirit may have a broader view of what needs to be acknowledged, shared, or healed. Sometimes the communicator who comes forward may not be the person we expected, but they may still be exactly the person we need.
I do not have to promise who will come through. I do not have to force a connection that is not developing naturally. I can simply work with what is being given and allow the evidence to unfold. Of course, someone may come to a reading deeply hoping to hear from a particular loved one, and many times that is exactly who steps forward. Other times, it may not be. I am learning to trust that there may be a reason for that too.
Learning to Listen
The deeper I move into this work, the more I realize that mediumship, at least for me, is about trusting Spirit and what comes forward organically. It is not my job to decide who speaks and where the conversation goes. My job is to listen, trust, and follow the connection that naturally presents itself.💜
